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Dear Transformers, 1) There is a crazed, right-wing army colonel trying to take over the world by pumping all the data out of my computer and uploading it to a dysfunctional sattelite. I think he's trying to beam it to aliens from the planet Tyrol. What should i do?
2) I want to ask Ken Shamrock out, but every time I try, he goes crazy and beants me up. What should I do?
3) Why is the room going around and around?
Elvis McBashem Red Alert Responds: Dear Elvis McBashem, A...crazed, right-wing army colonel?!? Oh no! It's the day I've been dreading for millions of years! Battle stations! For the love of God, BATTLE STATIONS!
Questions, comments, complaints? E-mail PerceptorTFWW (the one with the TFWW)
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